#RomanticFridayWriters - Challenge No 38- Being the Perfect Ex.

Here's my RomanticFridayWriters post for Friday June 15. Try your hand at a little flash fiction/poetry! It's mucho fun! Our challenge this week is to write to the prompt, Being the Perfect Ex. You can imagine what fun we're going to see in the stories/poetry from members and casual writers. You're most welcome to write to the prompt. Check out the RFW site by clicking on the link above, where you'll find stimulus for the challenge (as if you need any!)

On the Streets of London

Geffron checks his text messages. Nothing. She must have been serious about leaving.

He looks up. A movement down the street catches his attention – a billowing green cloak, a black scarf, red boots. Only Marsilia would dress so outrageously. Wasn’t he always telling her to tone it down? He hesitates, squints into the weak sun, shakes his head. ‘It can’t be! She said she’d never come back to London, calling it a damp hole.’ He stands still, smoothing his hair, stroking his beard, arguing with himself. But she’s changed her mind! That’s a woman for you. Oh, but he's so glad she did.

He begins running, nearly tripping over his Ralph Lauren black trench coat, calling out ‘Marsilia! You’ve come back! Marsilia!’

He runs as fast as his slippery Paul Smith Derby shoes permit, pushing people aside, ignoring angry snarls.

 ‘Marsilia! Wait for me!’

 He grabs her arm just before she obeys the ‘WALK’ sign. When did Marsilia ever obey a sign? To her they were just a suggestion. Something to do with her Italian roots he supposed, while he’d been conditioned to wait all day. He could never ignore a ‘DON’T WALK’ sign. How many times had he argued with her about stepping into the traffic? He’d get so angry he wouldn’t talk to her for days, especially after the latest near miss which resulted in a jaywalking offense on both their records. That really stung.

But he’s made up his mind that he’ll let Marsilia do whatever she wants from now on if she’ll just take him back. What’s a few traffic offenses when all’s said and done? Since she left him he’d gone back to his strict regime of sleep, eat, work and no play. He's bored. He can’t go back to his old life. He's realizing how much he needs Marsilia to put the spice into his life, the zing into his step.

‘Whaddya think you’re doing, hipster freak?’

Startled, he tugs her arm, appalled at the menace in her voice.

‘Let go of me or I’ll call the cops.'

She slaps at him with her free arm. Her cape falls away to the elbow. A ghoulish tattoo screams at him. What? He looks up to meet her icy eyes. His fingers uncurl. He glances from side to side. The Londoners have ignored the little altercation. Too wrapped up in their own boring lives.

‘You’re not Marsilia,’ he says stupidly. ‘Marsilia’s left me.’

‘No wonder buster. Beat it.’

©DeniseCovey2012

WORDS: 413

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Insecure Writers Support Group. Continuing my previous post on 'Be Your Own Structural Editor'.

Hello there!

Following last month's post, I promised to continue this topic. As many authors are publishing e-books, some good, some bad, some riddled with spelling, grammar and structural mistakes, I thought it was timely as self-pubbed authors don't have access to all the editorial help available to those who are lucky/unlucky (depending on your experience) enough to go the traditional route.

My first post talked about writing the first draft, putting it away for a week, month, whatever, then getting it out again and seeing what is to be done. According to the structural editor I conferred with recently at Queensland Writers Centre, the first stage of the editing process is structural, i.e. seeing how the larger elements of your work fit together.

A good idea is to start with a chapter breakdown (you may have done one in the planning stage, but quite likely it has changed during the first draft) before you begin your structural analysis. This provides a skeleton structure of your ms and is useful for analysing plot lines and characters' story arcs. Maybe you'll find a key plotline fades out before it should, or a character you meant to be key throughout the novel vanishes altogether in an early chapter.

Structural analysis is hard work. It's best to break it down through a series of questions for - CHARACTERISATION, NARRATIVE VOICE/POV, PLOT, STRUCTURE.

This post will look at CHARACTERISATION. I'll look at the others in future posts if this post appears helpful.

CHARACTERISATION - questions to ask yourself:

• Does your story have a clear main character with a developed story arc?
• Do you know what the secondary characters are contributing to the story? What is their function?
• Do your characters DO things, or are they passive?
• Do you know why your significant characters act the way they do (their motivation)?
• Are there too many characters? Could you merge minor characters that fulfil the same function, or remove characters without a clear role?
• Is there a balance of narrative text and dialogue, i.e., are you letting your characters speak?

(These dot point courtesy of Nicola O'Shea, freelance editor for a wide range of Australian publishers/authors. Go to www.nicolaoshea.com for more...)

Further points:

At a recent Toolkit for Writers workshop it was stated that your antagonist wants to be the protagonist. Is your antagonist strong enough to have his/her desire met?

I read a related article at KM Weiland's Helping Writers Become Authors, where she states your mc needs not one, but at least two conflicts. Another thing to think about when you're being your own editor.

• I hope this was a helpful post for IWSG. The purpose of Alex J Cavanaugh's group is to share and encourage. Writers can express doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those who have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It’s a safe haven for insecure writers of all kinds! Go here for more participants...

A word before I go. RomanticFridayWriters' next challenge is Being the Perfect Ex. 400 words of prose or poetry. Open to all writers. You can learn more here...